Category Archives: notes from nikki

Christopher John Joseph Reimer memorial blog: 2013 in review

WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepare a 2013 annual report for this blog.

Chris always found marketing and publicity to be a disgusting and dirty business. In many ways, it is. One might suggest that to focus, therefore, on the numbers that this memorial blog reached in 2013 to be craven, and disgusting, but I don’t quite see it that way.

A metaphor I’ve been rolling around in my brain over the past several days is this: When someone dies–I think particularly if they die young–who they were and how they lived is akin to a wave or a splash in the ocean. The impact that Chris and his music, his life and his death had on people was at first enormous. 25,000 people visited this blog in the first days after his death. 90 people wrote to tell us how much his beautiful spirit and his music meant to them. 700 people attended the funeral. In the sad and dark months that followed the inner circle of friends and family were continually heartened by the community of people that rushed to support us and to remember and memorialize Chris in words, in art and in music.

It’s impossible to know how you might, in your life, impact other people. My brother was genuinely self-effacing and humble, and I know he would have been floored to know the heartfelt, positive things that people said about him after he died. I wish he could have known and believed such sentiments in life. The waves of the magic Chris brought to the world in his 26 short years have continued to reverberate. Over 2012 and 2013, people continued to remember him, and write to us. We were pleased to see The Chad Tape sell out; the only thing Chris wanted to achieve was to make music, and to have that music reach and effect people. It did and it has. I’m sad that he didn’t live to release his solo work and watch it reach people, and I don’t understand metaphysics as much as I would like, but maybe where/whatever he is now knows and feels this?

Gold released the digital Losing Your Hair EP in 2012; Mammoth Cave records put out the vinyl 7″ EP this year. It’s bittersweet because the tracks were recorded by Chris and feature his drumming; the last thing he physically contributed to before moving on. Sadly, Gold broke up after the album came out, but some of the members are working on new projects together, and I look forward to hearing what they come up with in 2014.

We were moved beyond words when The Dodos Carrier came out in the summer, and we are grateful for the kind things that Meric and Logan have said about Chris in interviews this year.

Quickdraw Animation Society approached us late in the spring to ask about the possibility of a collaborative, animated tribute. A call for submissions has gone out and the deadline for notice of intent is January 15. The film is slated for completion in fall 2014. We’re very excited to see what people submit.

So the waves of response to my brother continue, smaller and slower but steady. I know that they will continue. But I also know that, as time continues inexorably forward, the mighty splash will gradually become a slower and shorter oscillation.

Some waves undergo a phenomenon called “breaking”. A breaking wave is one whose base can no longer support its top, causing it to collapse. A wave breaks when it runs into shallow water, or when two wave systems oppose and combine forces. When the slope, or steepness ratio, of a wave is too great, breaking is inevitable.  Source: Wikipedia.

Life goes on, as it should and it must. Eventually the need to remember Chris Reimer will fade into the faintest ripple on a distant shore. Other musicians will break into and sustain public consciousness; other musicians will die and will be mourned. This is as it should be: we all live and die. After the initial phase of shock and mourning, life goes on as it did before, for most people at least.

This has been one of the hardest things for me to reconcile: That to the wider world and perhaps even to our wider community of friends, family, and artists, Chris will fade in importance. That people will forget him.

So I thank you for visiting and reading over 2013, and I thank you for remembering Chris.

Love to you and yours, and best wishes for 2014, wherever you are.

–Nikki

Chris with girlfriend Rena in 2011

Chris with girlfriend Rena in early 2012



Here’s an excerpt of the blog report:

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 10,000 times in 2013. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 4 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

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November 29, 2012

On November 29, 2011, Chris Reimer achieved one of his dreams when he got to play live on international television as The Dodos‘ backing guitarist on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, along with Neko Case. I’ve posted the video of their set here.

Thanks to sister Rena Nicole Kozak for noting the auspiciousness of the date! Below is her photo from that night.

Chris on Jimmy Fallon

Thanks are also due to Elizabeth Bachinsky, who on November 17 launched her 4th poetry title, I Don’t Feel So Good (BookThug) at W2 Community Media Arts in Vancouver. Liz most generously decided to make the launch a fundraiser for the Chris Reimer Legacy Fund, and they raised over $900! Hearty thanks are also due to Dina del Bucchia, W2, Sean Cranbury, and musical guest stars TOTAL ICE, Jaime Cullen and Morgan Greenwood.

Photos from the evening are below, courtesy Liz Bachinsky, Jenn Farrell, Ray Hsu.

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Nikki’s Tribute

I want to keep this space Chris-centric (I’ve devoted other spaces online to my feelings and my grief), but I did want to share an edited version of the tribute that I read at Chris’ ceremony. 

I expect that I will continue to grieve him, miss him, love him, write about him, and hear him in music for the rest of my own life, but this is one small piece, for now.

——

This is an edited version of the tribute that I read at Chris’ funeral/celebration of life on February 29, 2012.

I loved my brother even before he came to be gestated in our mother’s womb. I was five years old when she got pregnant. I was so excited about it, and I was beside myself with joy when my father told me that I had a little brother, that he’d been born at 6:02 p.m., and that his name was Christopher.

At the beginning he was my baby, whom I held and cuddled and cared for, then he became my little pal, the three year old who was star and co-star in all my plays, the consummate professional who never forgot his lines. When he got a bit older still, more than my brother, he was my friend, my buddy, my confidante. We took turns playing straight man and funny man. I know that since our childhood he’d gone out into the world and touched an amazing number of people, and though I was happy to share him, I always thought of him as mine first.

I’ve spent some of the past few days going through our emails, instant messages and texts, most of which are really hilarious but unfortunately entirely inappropriate to share in this setting. If you know my brother you can imagine the content. You’ve probably had similar exchanges with him. Continue reading

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Oh Chris

two bad apples

I miss you so much. I don’t know if I can stand this.

N.

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Stay Gold, Ponyboy

Nothing Gold Can Stay

Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

-Robert Frost, 1923

From S.E. Hinton’s The Outsiders 

Johnny: It’s like the mist is what’s pretty, ya know? All gold and silver.

Ponyboy: Hmm

Johnny: Too bad it can’t stay like that all the time.

Ponyboy: Nothing gold can stay.

 —-

Johnny’s last lines to Ponyboy: Stay gold, Ponyboy. Stay gold.

Logan Kroeber

 

WE LOVE YOU CHRIS

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February 27, 2012

Dear Chris,

You left us approximately one week ago, right now, give or take a few hours. We don’t know exactly what time you left, but our neighbour Sandeep tells us that a meteor crossed the sky at about midnight or one o’clock that night. Apparently there was lightning. We can only assume it was you.

This guy from your Sea Vegetable series now graces my arm. I think you’d dig it; dude did a great job. Jonathon thinks it looks like a turnip, and Mom said it looks like a heart. I just see my brother.

Miss you so much.

Nikki

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Thank You

Thank you everyone from the bottom of my heart. The family is shattered, broken, confused and in disbelief, but we are also so comforted and honoured by all of your words and images and thoughts.

We all thought that Chris Reimer was pretty fucking special, and the suggestion that others thought he was a fraction as amazing is buoying us up in this surreal time.

I can’t post the tributes as fast as they are coming in; if yours has not yet shown up please be patient. It will still appear. Thank you for your thoughtfulness and your heart.

Chris was five years and eleven months younger than me, but in so many ways we were twinned. He was my best friend from the moment he was born. We knew each other without need for words, though through the years there was nothing we could not discuss. I always believed and still do that we were two halves of the same soul. There was nothing I would not have done for my brother in life and now that he has moved on, there is nothing I won’t do to remember his spirit on earth.

He was a brilliant artist, a sensitive, intuitive, compassionate soul, and a seriously funny motherfucker.

He mattered. He still matters. Continue reading

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